I’d like to start by saying I love my husband. He really is a good guy with a good heart and we have a beautiful daughter and other than being a little insensitive sometimes, he’s a pretty good guy. In real life, I would never cheat on him. But in my alternate life (work), I have a boyfriend. His name is Brandon. He’s a cute, friendly, nice guy. The only problem is he doesn’t know he’s my boyfriend. I’m not even positive he knows my name, even though we’ve been sitting about 10 feet away from each other for 8 months.
But somehow I know SO MUCH about him, probably enough for him to think I’m psycho if he knew what I was thinking. Not to mention, the multiple dreams I have had involving him.
Am I in love with him? Nope. So what is the big deal? How did this start, you ask? Well, I will attempt to tell you. I still to this day can’t really even give myself a good reason why I’m obsessed with him, but I’m going to do my best to explain it to you (and myself).
My good friend/confidante/co-worker is the only other living soul who knows about this. I am so thankful that I am able to tell her. I think my head would explode if I had to keep it all inside. Not even my therapist, whom I put on a pedestal and trust with my deepest thoughts and feelings, knows. My friend has been encouraging me to start this blog, and I’m glad she did. I’m not afraid to admit that I’m obsessive, but I swear to you I am not a stalker! Although when she jokingly said I should follow him home, I briefly considered it!
It all began before I sat so close to him. I saw him one day on my way back from the bathroom. Our eyes locked for a couple of seconds…I did a double take…and I was hooked. He was probably wondering why this weird chick kept staring at him. Before you know it, I started making extra trips to the bathroom and kitchen. I know, I know! I’m pathetic. Anyway, by chance, an office around the corner opened up and because I do a lot of training and conference calls on speaker phone, I thought it would be considerate of me to move away from the cubicles I shared with two others. At least that’s what I told myself. He was a bit of extra incentive. So here I am.
There is only a small window of time to be introduced to someone you work with before you only know them as “the person you occasionally see around the office”. After that, it’s just weird. My friend and I have on many occasions discussed, theorized and dissected why I’m so interested in this boy. In our professional opinion, we’ve decided it’s because I don’t know him and he is a mystery to me. He seems like the “nice guy” in the office. And for now, that’s a perfectly acceptable reason to me. Nothing crazy about that!
So here I am, day after day, finding reasons to see him. What will it be today? An extra visit to the bathroom? Will I needlessly print a document to the printer directly in front of his office? Or both? Which ever one, rest assured I will find a reason.
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